1 Mar


In the past two days, we have covered two of the top needs in your husband’s life.  Respect and to be needed.

In Dr. Kevin Leman’s book, he tells us what these top three are.

The third is to be FULFILLED.

1.  For your husband, sexual fulfillment fills a powerful emotional need!

Your husband needs sex and he needs for you to enjoy it.

1Cor.7:4-5 “The wife hath not power of (over) her own body, but the husband (does): and likewise also the husband hath not power of (over) his own body, but the wife (does).  Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again (continue to have sexual intercourse), that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.”

According to surveys taken from Shaunti Feldhahn in her book “For women only” when men were asked how important it was for them to feel sexually desired and wanted by their wife, 66% said very important. Also, 31% said somewhat important and the other 3% were in the irrelevant and not very important category.


Don’t ignore that number!

Your husband may not tell you but he could be burdened with secret feeling of inadequacy

The same way you would feel if your husband stopped speaking to you, is as emotionally serious to him.

74% of men said that they could not be sexually satisfied if their wives were reluctant or just accommodating to their sexual needs.

Sex makes your man feel loved and gives him the strength to face the world with confidence.

A fulfilling sex life creates great benefits in your husbands life..

This verse plainly explains that it is FRAUD if one or the other refrains from sex without the others permission.

I have worked with many wives who have refused sex all together.

What I tell them is the next time they refuse their husband sex, she needs to go on a FOOD FAST the next day.  Then I ask her what she thinks she will be thinking about all day and how will her stomach feel.

This may seem unfair, but this is exactly how HE FEELS.

He didn’t marry you because he couldn’t wait for you to hang those ugly flowered curtains on your kitchen windows.

He didn’t marry you for your great cooking cause his mothers cooking was better.

He married you because he thought he was going to have GREAT SEX with his bride the rest of his life.

Dr. Laura says that what every husband wants is his wives naked body slapped against his.

Did you marry him under FALSE PRETENCES?

Let the food burn girls.

2.  He also needs to know that he is your number one priority.

Once you get married, your husband ends up last.  Kids, housecleaning, work, neighbors, hobbies, cooking and everything else comes first.

Your husband needs to be fulfilled by you emotionally and physically.  You were hand-picked to do this and equipped for it.


The three basic needs are to be respected, to be needed, and to be fulfilled.

Once again, the exciting part is that wives are EQUIPPED to do all three.

Want a great marriage that will last a lifetime?  Put these three basic needs to practice starting TODAY!


A special thanks to Jackie Melendez for sharing this great book with me.

2 Responses to “YOUR HUSBANDS TOP THREE NEEDS (Continued /Final)”

  1. PJ March 6, 2016 at 5:18 pm #

    Thank you for your blog. I face a terribly difficult situation in which I am a newlywed (1.5 years) and my husband is not interested in me sexually. We were both virgins when we got married and we did consummate the marriage. I, at least, entered marriage with a healthy and positive view of marital sexuality. Now, it is ruined.

    I feel desperately saddened emotionally in knowing that my husband does not desire me, and in fact has called me “unfeminine and unsensuous.” According to any standard of beauty out there I am at least slightly above average beauty and figure; I very much care about having a feminine appearance. He is simply hyper-critical of me in this regard, and in others such as cooking and housekeeping.

    My confidence and sense of self has been eroded over the 1.5 years of our marriage, and I feel tricked into marrying a man who does not have an interest in sex with me.

    How can I protect my mental health in a marriage where I am undesired by my husband? I am only 29 and life with him seems like an eternity. I don’t even know why he likes me and wanted to marry me other than for procreation.

    • nancysalazar March 6, 2016 at 10:11 pm #

      Hi PJ! Thanks so much for your comment. It would be so unfair for me to make any judgements or conclusions to your situation without knowing more information. However, I will give you enough information and suggestions that will definitely assist you. There are several couples and wives that are going through what you are going through. First, know that God is with you and as you seek Him with all your heart, He will help you through this but it is a process. The symptoms that your husband is displaying is very typical of a man that is into pornography. They start making every excuse not to have sex and criticize their wives. Rather than admitting to their own actions, they make their spouse feel belittled. The statistics show that men looking at pornography is in the high 80’s. They find that more convenient and more gratifying. Google Dr. Doug Weiss and get his materials. He even has materials for wives who are victimized by their husbands. He is excellent! The number one thing you need to do is establish a disciplined prayer life. Find intercessors to keep your marriage in prayer. Draw close to God and find peace and contentment in Him. Remember, God is a God of miracles and everyday hundreds of men are delivered from whatever your husband is struggling with. Nothing is to hard for God! Praying for you!

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