DO YOU OFFEND YOUR SPOUSE?

15 Aug

DO YOU OFFEND YOUR SPOUSE?

A trademark is a distinctive characteristic or attribute.

What is your distinct characteristic or attribute?

What are your distinguishing qualities?

There are positive and negative CHARACTERISTICS in everyone.

The Corinthian church was so rude that is became their “trademark.”

The Apostle Paul was so annoyed with them that he addressed it personally to them.

1Cor.13:5 “…Charity (agape love)…doth not behave itself unseemly…”

The word “unseemly” means rude.

This TYPE of person is tackless or thoughtless.

Do you offend your spouse?

Are you courteous and show good manners toward your SPOUSE?

When it comes to your spouse’s feelings do you try to be sensitive?

Do you put yourself FIRST or do you put your spouses interests first?

Love doesn’t keep track of wrongs.

Don’t keep track of your spouse’s SINS.

Is your language to your spouse harsh and brutal?

Did you PASS God’s high-level love test?

If you asked your spouse if you acted like an irritable person would his/her response be, very rarely?

Is your trademark that you FORCE yourself on your spouse and other people?

Love doesn’t elbow it’s way into conversations.

Here is a tragic story by Steven Cole:

A rude man would never open the car door for his wife.  He said, “She doesn’t have two broken arms.”  She died and at the burial the husband was standing by the funeral car where his wife’s casket lay.  The funeral director asked the husband, “Open the door for her, will you?”  As he reached for the car door, he realized he had never opened the door for her in his life.  In her death, it will be the first, last and only time he would do that for her.  He ended up living a life of torment and regret.

I can’t begin to tell you the amount of times I have talked to wives who have so many regrets after their husbands have left home or died.

What is YOUR trademark?

Did you pass God’s love test in 1Corinthians 13.

You can CHANGE your trademark today!

Let the Holy Spirit give you a godly trademark.

NOTE:  Daily there is a new post to help your marriage succeed.

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OVERBEARING PRIDE DESTROYS MARRIAGES

14 Aug

OVERBEARING PRIDE DESTROYS MARRIAGES

Have you ever been around someone who is prideful and arrogant?

I think all of us have at some time or another.

An arrogant person is someone who shows feelings of unwarranted importance out of overbearing pride.

The Apostle Paul was upset with the Corinth church who was displaying this type of ATTITUDE to one another.

1Cor.13:4 “…Charity…is not puffed up…”

To be “puffed up” is to have a big head.

When someone is acting conceited, they have an overestimation of their  own importance, ability and achievement.

A really GREAT person, never thinks of themselves as being important.

No one likes the “important person.”

1Cor.4:6 “…that no one of you be puffed up for one against another.”

1Cor.8:1 “…knowledge puffeth up, but love edifieth.”

Do you ever disregard your spouse?  To disregard means that you willfully show a lack of care and attention to your spouse.

Are you aware that this is an act of ARROGANCE?

Do you ever disrespect your spouse?

If you are doing this, you need to stop!

Lucifer was too IMPRESSED with himself and lost everything before being  thrown out of heaven.

Remember that when you live with an attitude of selfish pride, it is the opposite of humility.

Love is not selfish, arrogant, prideful or conceited.

CASE AND POINT:  I remember my husband and I were invited to go to Washington D.C.  My husband had to go to a press conference in front of the Senate building.  There was a Rabbi that also was going to speak at the press conference.  When I was introduced to the Rabbi, I put out my hand to shake his hand.  He pulled his hand back and said some words to me.  I can’t remember what he said word for word, but he was telling me that he could not touch me.  In other words, to this Jewish Rabbi, I was an “unclean thing.”  My husband told me that, that is not what he said.  I told him I know, but it is what he meant.  I felt so honored!  I can’t explain it, but for me to be in the presence of a Jewish person has always been an honor for me.  But here is a Rabbi telling me that he can’t shake my hand.  He wasn’t being rude, he was being religious.

The Rabbi continued talking to me, he just wouldn’t shake my hand.

You were not “born to be wild” with a big swelled head.

You were born to show God’s love and focus on the needs of your spouse.

NOTE:  Daily there is a new post to help your marriage succeed.

WHO HAS BRAGGING RIGHTS?

13 Aug

WHO HAS BRAGGING RIGHTS?

Do you like to parade your accomplishments around?

In the city of Corinth, Paul was upset with them because they were bragging about their spiritual gifts yet they were not showing love to one another.

Chances are that their listeners were extremely annoyed with this ceaseless bragging.

Have you ever been around someone who loves to brag about themself

CASE AND POINT:  I am not just saying this but my husband is multi-talented.  He is one of those people who are good at just about everything. He is mechanical, technical, musical, and an array of other areas that send my head spinning.  I have been with him since 1965 and I have never heard him brag about himself.   Never!  Yet I can meet someone for the first time and they will not stop talking about how great they are.  He does what he needs to do and he doesn’t care who gets the credit or who knows he is the one who did it.

This is what Paul said in 1Cor.13:4“…charity (agape love) vaunteth not itself…”

The Greek word for vaunteth is PERPEREUOMAI which means “a lot of self-talk.”

This type of person is so outrageous in their bragging that they tend to lie about themselves.

Paul was exhorting themselves to stop displaying their spiritual gifts so everyone will know.

Be careful because bragging can come around subtly and suddenly.

Woman have a tendency to do this about their children.

I have learned that woman only like me to brag about their children, not mine.

You brag when you heap praises on yourself, even if it is the truth.

When we lived in England, they would say a person who brags about themselves is “full of themselves.”

Boy, do I agree with that!!!

You have to be full of yourself to entertain people with words on how great you are.

Prov.25:14 “Like clouds and wind without rain is a man who boasts of gifts he does not give.”  NIV

When you are showing agape love to someone, you do not act superior to them because it results in separation.

Who in their right mind wants to be around someone who is obsessed with themselves.

Barclay writes:  True love will always be far more impressed with it’s own unworthiness than it’s own merit.

If you are bragging to your spouse, it is a sin because it is not a demonstration of the love of God.

Doesn’t bragging put you in first place and God with everyone else somewhere down at the end of the totem pole?

Bragging builds you up but puts your spouse down.

NOTE:  Daily there is a new post to help your marriage succeed.

PRAISING GOD IN DIFFICULTIES

12 Aug

PRAISING GOD IN DIFFICULTIES

NO MATTER WHAT CIRCUMSTANCES you face as a couple, nothing will refresh and energize your communication with God like praising Him.  A few of the many Scriptures that praise God also to encourage us to express our admiration of Him.  Consider the following psalms:

*  “And my tongue shall speak of your righteousness and of Your praise all the day long.”  Psa.35:28

*  “Enter into His gates with thanksgiving, and into His courts with praise.”  Psa.100:4

*  “Praise the Lord!  For it is good to sing praises to our God; for it is pleasant, and praise is beautiful. (Psa.147:1)

Over the years we have learned to praise Him for:

*  Who He is—He is God almighty!

*  What He has done for us in the past, calling to mind in prayer His acts on our behalf.

*  What He has promised us in Scripture, including His pledge to never leave nor forsake us.

When we acknowledge God’s greatness in our lives, we remember who He really is and His great love for us.  We like what one couple told us: “We’ve learned to praise God, in the hard times and to call to Him and to lift His name high even when the circumstances look impossible or difficult.  “As a result, we’ve learned that praising God lifts us out of our challenges and realigns our hearts with His.

The next time you face a difficult circumstance, pause and begin to praise God for what you are facing.  Ask Him to fill you with His spirit and honor Him in the midst of your difficulty.

NOTE:  This article is from the Family life and Marriage Bible by Dennis and Barbara Rainey.

NOTE:  Daily there is a new post to help your marriage succeed.

SATURDAY – QUESTION & ANSWER  

11 Aug

SATURDAY – QUESTION & ANSWER  

Question #1:  How can husbands and wives please each other more consistently?

Answer #1:  As you seek to learn what pleases your mate, consider the following top fives provided by Dr. Willard Harley in his book His Needs, Her Needs:

Top Five Ways for a Man

to Please His Wife

1.  Have a strong commitment to your family; make it a priority.

2.  Provide security:  emotional, financial, personal protection, etc.

3.  Be willing to be her partner, to share life with her in honest, open relationship.

4.  Talk with her in complete sentences; take time to discuss subjects with her.

5.  Provide nonsexual affection:  hugging, touching, tenderness, closeness that doesn’t demand a sexual response.

Top Five Ways for a Woman

to Please Her Husband

1.  Show your mate admiration and respect through verbal praise.

2.  Provide domestic support–help to keep the home in order.

3.  Be attractive; he wants to be proud of you.

4.  Offer recreational companionship.

5.  Help him to pleasure you through an exciting, satisfying sexual union.

Paul wrote, “Let each of us please his neighbor for his good, leading to edification” (Rom.15:2).  Well, who is more your “neighbor” than your spouse, with whom you spend so many hours together every day?

NOTE:  This article was from the book Family Life and Marriage Bible by Dennis and Barbara Rainey.

NOTE:  Daily there is a new post to help your marriage succeed.

 ENVY CAUSES DISASTER IN MARRIAGES

10 Aug

 ENVY CAUSES DISASTER IN MARRIAGES

Almost everyone has heard the expression, “Green with Envy.”

You might think of envy as a “small sin” or something that is not a very big deal.

The bible is full of examples of the disasters that envy had on personal relationships.

The first one was with Cain and Abel that resulted in the killing of his brother.  (Gen.4:3-8)

Envy is one of the most damaging of all sins and hurts many people and marriages.

It is a “GREEN MONSTER!!”

The reason why envy is the “green monster” is that, where envy is, LOVE cannot be.

1Cor.13:4 “…love does not envy…”

Have you ever been envious?  Let me tell you now that it does not accomplish anything good.

If you are envious, there is an antidote for you:  LOVE!

For envy, LOVE is the best antidote.

Envy reveals itself in two ways:

  1. When your heart and mind is desiring something which is possessed by someone else;
  2. When you have spite and resentment at seeing the success of someone else.

Are you satisfied with your own portion or do you want someone else’s.  Love is happiest when someone else has more.

Are you envious of someone else’s marriage?

Do you compare your finances to another couple’s finances?

Do you compare yourself to another person’s status or success and find yourself envying them?

If you are walking in agape love, your concern will be the success of others.

Envy caused Joseph’s brothers to have him enslaved.  Acts 7:9 “…became jealous of Joseph…”

Envy caused the Jews to have Jesus crucified.  Matt.27:18 “…For he knew that they had handed Him over because of envy…”

If you are envious, you will find fault in everyone.

That “Green Monster” will seek out reasons for you to be envious.

The most miserable person you will find, is some one who is filled with envy.

Don’t let envy destroy your life and your marriage.

The antidote is LOVE!

NOTE:  Daily there is a new post to help your marriage succeed.

TRY A LITTLE TENDERNESS

9 Aug

TRY A LITTLE TENDERNESS

The word “kind” in the Greek is CHRESTEUOMAI, which means to be adaptable or compliant to the needs of others.

Do you ever demand that your spouse or other people be like you?

Agape love makes you want to go the extra mile to become what others need you to be for them.

Selfishness and self-centeredness is the complete opposite to being kind.

Do you have a willingness to change so you can meet the needs of your spouse.

Are you good natured and gentle to your spouse and others?

Do you treat your spouse tenderly and with affection.

To be “kind” shows courtesy.

In 1Corinthians 13, it was the second characteristic of the highest level of agape love.

1Corinthians 13:4 “Charity…is kind…”

God designed these verses to mention being “kind” as a characteristic for us to examine ourselves to see how we match up.

“Kindness” explains what agape love is.

Do you look for a way of being constructive with your spouse?

Showing kindness 24/7 is impossible for us to demonstrate on our own

We need the Holy Spirit to guide and strengthen us all the way and all the day.

Kindness is a generous portion of active “goodwill.”

Are you a big dose of “sweet usefulness?”

That is the definition of “kindness.”

As you are kind to your spouse, you will be shown kindness.

When Jesus commanded His disciples to love their enemies, He did not simply mean to feel kindly about them, but to be kind to them.  (Matt.5:40-41)

In 1Corinthians, Paul is not writing about how love feels, he is writing about how it can be seen in action.

This evil world gives agape love many opportunities to demonstrate kindness to others.

Mark Twain call kindness “A language that the deaf can hear and the blind can read.

Kindness is a universal language because it does not speak to the intellect, but directly to the heart.

True love is always demonstrated by action.

Remember:  The way to love anything is to realize that it may be lost tomorrow.

NOTE:  Daily there is a new post to help your marriage succeed.