15 Jun


Most of the comments made in this post were taken from the book “For Women Only” by Shaunti Feldhahn.  The author has taken many surveys in order to come up with the statistics that are included in her books.  This survey was done by four hundred anonymous men across the country, ranging in age from twenty-one to seventy-five.  They answered two dozen questions about their lives and about how they think, what they feel, and what they need.  Feldhahn then conducted a more informal follow-up survey of another four hundred churchgoers.  Across all these there were very few differences in the answers by secular men and Christian men.

The author has listed seven revelations that are the results of her surveys which she felt were important but there are other areas.

As we go through these areas, keep in mind that every area of a man’s life, AFFECTS the other areas.

The inner life of a man is a package, with these elements melded and wrapped up inside.

These revelations are also backed up by EVIDENCE—a groundbreaking professional survey .

  1. Men need respect

Men would rather feel unloved than inadequate and disrespected.

2.  Men are insecure

Despite their “in control” exterior, men often feel like impostors and are insecure that their inadequacies will be discovered.

3.  Men are providers

Even if you personally made enough income to support the family’s lifestyle, it would make no difference to the mental burden he feels to provide.

4.  Men want more sex

Your sexual desire for your husband profoundly affects his sense

of well-being and confidence in all areas of his life.

5.  Men are visual

Even happily married men struggle with being pulled toward live and recollected images of other women.

6.  Men are unromantic clods

Actually, most men enjoy romance (sometimes in different ways) and want to be romantic—but hesitate because they doubt they can succeed.

7.  Men care about appearance

You don’t need to be a size 3, but your man does need to see you making the effort to take care of yourself—and he will take on significant cost or inconvenience in order to support you.

Feldhahn’s ground rules

First, Don’t male-bash, because these men shared their heart with her.

Second, this is focusing entirely in how we relate to men, not the other way around.

Third,  keep in mind that there are always exceptions to the rule.

Fourth, this is addressing what is normal inside men.

Fifth, some of the enclosed insight may be distressing because it affects our view of the men in our lives and our view of ourselves.  These are things that men often weren’t willing or able to say directly to their spouses or girlfriends.

Because your husband is wired as a man, this is why you love him.

NOTE:  Don’t miss tomorrows post.  Daily there is a new post.

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