REACTIONS THAT DESTROY YOUR MARRIAGE
In life and in our marriage we will have mental, emotional and spiritual sufferings.
These are the crosses that we MUST bare daily.
We must accept various trials as from the “hand of God” for our discipline and purification.
The Apostle Paul said we are to reckon ourselves dead, as no longer existing, having no will apart from God’s will.
There are three reactions we must overcome:
FIRST REACTION: Pride
Prov. 16:18 “Pride goes before destruction and a haughty spirit before a fall.”
SECOND REACTION: Anger
Prov.16:32 “He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty.”
THIRD REACTION: Self-pity
Psa.119:28 “My soul melteth for heaviness; strengthen thou me according unto thy word.”
Here are some progressive stages of dying to yourself:
- Correct your evil habits in your marriage.
- Stop depending on the feelings of JOY and well-being.
We think that we lose God when we lose our inward joy.
Personal pleasure is not what your moral life of your soul consists of. It is being in unity with the will of God.
Your marriage lives and thrives by faith and not feelings.
- Crucifying your reliance on your good virtues (moral excellence), temperance, faith, benevolence (kind acts) is a necessary stage.
Dependence on your personal virtues is a form of SELF.
- Cease rebelling against the negative marital circumstances of life.
Accept them as from the hand of God in order to crucify SELF.
Receive these negative issues with CHEERFULNESS.
- The natural man is crucified on the cross and now you proceed to a life in union with God and your spouse.
There should be harmony between your will and Gods divine will which results in becoming ONE.
The Apostle Paul said, “I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me.”
Don’t think you can react to your spouse anyway you want and advance in your relationship with God.
You don’t advance in Christ till your soul is transformed.
NOTE: Daily there is a new post to help your marriage be successful.
LOVE YOUR SPOUSE 
I totally agree with your thesis. Thank you for sharing your wisdom. God has done an incredible work in helping me crucify my flesh as I experience negative issues in my marriage. I recently crucified resentments that were affecting my negative reactions. And, God has helped me put on self-control. I feel stable in my inward parts now. My husband has noticed that I do not over-react any more. God is good.