21 Nov


There are ways to make your spouse like you and one of them is to be genuinely interested in them.

Morning, noon and night your spouse is interested in HIMSELF.

Phil.2:4 “Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.”  KJV

 “Look out for the interest of others and not only for your own personal interest.”  NSB (New Simplified Bible)

Statistics show that it is easier for you to make your spouse a friend in two months by becoming genuinely interested in him than you can in two years trying to get him interested in you.

Spouses, it’s alright to do things for your SPOUSE that requires your time, energy, unselfishness and thoughtfulness.

Listen to what your spouse likes and take them a gift of something they will enjoy.

Listen for CLUES of what your spouse is interested on and initiate a conversation on the topic of his interests.

If you want to know what your spouse is interested in, have a Bar-B-Q and invite your spouse’s friends.  Listen to their conversation and you will learn their favorite topics.

In Meriden, Connecticut, a survey was done to see what subjects adults were most interested in studying.

The result of the study was that their first interest was Health.

The Second interest was in people:

How to understand and get along with people;

How to make people like you; and

How to win others to your way of thinking.

The authors sole purpose of his survey and book was to help readers discover, develop and profit from their physical and mental resources that are dormant and unused assets.

CASE AND POINT:  There was a time in my marriage when I felt like I didn’t have anything of interest to contribute in trying to open communication with my husband.  I decided that the only way I can have a conversation that would prompt his interest was to ask a question on one of his favorite topics.  When I did that, he opened up and kept talking.  I felt like I had really accomplished something in our marriage.

This may seem very hard and strange at first because it takes us out of our “comfort zone.”

It stretches us to talk on a subject that we not only know nothing about but we are also not interested in it at all.

God will bless your EFFORTS.

Anything you do to improve your marriage, the Holy Spirit will get in the middle and anoint it.

It has happened to me over and over again.

Marriage isn’t for babies, it’s for adults.

You will get on the ground and play with a silly toy just to bond with your child and see a smile on their face, yet you don’t take the time to make conversation on a topic your spouse loves.

What are you WAITING for?

I’m glad I didn’t wait.

Don’t lose out on this daily opportunity that won’t come back again because of your PRIDE.

Just ask a widow!!

NOTE:  Daily there is a new post to help your marriage be a success.


  1. Sandy chrisman November 23, 2016 at 8:40 pm #

    Hi! I’ve read Love and Respect, at therapy we’ve been told to read John Gottmans books and nothing has worked. In a perfect world if I were perfect, great but we all know that not how it works. I’m so devastated that I don’t plan on getting out of bed for thanksgiving when his family comes over. He stonewalls everytime I have an issue we end up fighting over. He calls every name in the book and some I’ve never heard of. He used to physically abuse me too but somehow he listened to me on that one or I would have left him or thrown him in jail. He stonewalls me by doing tit for tat. I really think I’m done. I gave everything up for him. I wished I would have kept working because now I’m not marketable. His mom thinks he’s an angel. He’s 9 years younger. Yup, I’m done. I will find a way out. I’ve prayed for relationship for over 25 years. Good luck everyone.

    • nancysalazar November 24, 2016 at 5:31 pm #

      Hi Sandy! There is so much help that God wants to give you that will provide peace, strength and happiness into your life. He can totally change your life, but you have to do your part. You have a wounded soul. Our soul gets wounded by sin or trauma. Sin, when we commit sin to our own self, or someone else sins against us. If you lash back to your spouse, you are wounding your own soul as well as his. Trauma, if someone dies, you get fired, etc. First step for you is to Repent! Ask God to forgive you and try to think of everything you have done to your husband or anyone else. Forgive anyone who has violated you, including your husband. Christ died on the Cross and shed His blood so you can do this. 2nd step for you is to partake of the “power of the resurrection.” The word power in the Greek is “dunamus” and has many meanings. One of the meanings is “excellence of body and soul.” That means that God wants to heal your soul of all the damage. He resurrected and didn’t stay in the tomb so that you Sandy, could be “excellent of soul!” Everyday, all day long, every time you feel violated by your husband or anyone else, thank God for the power of His resurrection and ask him to pour his “dunamus” power and give you the excellent soul! You will not care what your husband does or says, because your soul will be healed. No one can ever hurt you again!!!! I know!!!! He has done it for me!!!! Free at last!!! The choice is yours!!! It is not about him, it is about you!!!! Only you have control over your soul!!

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