ARE YOU LOOKING GOOD?
The third thing that your husband needs is a GOOD LOOKING wife.
In the book “For Women Only” by Shaunti Feldhahn, I will be using some comments and statistics.
A wife’s blind spot is that she doesn’t know how important it is to her husband that she takes care of her looks and doesn’t look like a slouch around him.
Statistics show that women spend 40% of their free time on social networking.
This statistic shows where women today are setting their priorities.
When a survey was done, seven out of ten men indicated they would be EMOTIONALLY bothered if their wife let herself go and didn’t make the effort to do something about it. These are happily, married, younger, church going men.
83% of men said that he wants his wife to look and feel good. She doesn’t have to look the way she did the day they met, but it’s important that she makes an effort to look good now.
97% of men said they would be willing to make an effort to help their wives do what’s necessary to get in shape.
The effort you put into your appearance is extremely HIGH on his priority list.
Husbands feel it affects him because it affects his wife’s ability to do things and her self-worth and her desires.
Your dress is also important to God. 1Tim.2:9 “In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety…”
The word “shamefacedness” in the Greek implies to dress with reverence towards God.
Here are some areas for you to consider:
FIRST, celebrate our God-given individuality and body—make the best of it.
Most husbands don’t want their wife to be so super sensitive about their bodies.
Husbands don’t care if you have a PERFECT body or not.
You are the one who cares!!
SECOND, be careful that you are not trying to be a size 2.
THIRD, we need to accept how complicated and hypersensitive the appearance issue is for both partners.
You liked that he enjoyed your looks during courtship, but many women feel outright resentful that her appearance still matters so much to him now.
We need to show our man that we’re willing to make the effort to ADDRESS something that is very important to him.
Your effort matters most!!!
The fact that you are willing to make the effort to take care of yourself FOR HIM is the point.
This is BIG!!
Those of us who don’t believe in divorce may need to own up to a sneaking COMPLACENCY.
Because our husbands have pledged their faithfulness for a “better or for worse”, and because we know “it’s what’s inside that counts,” we can easily migrate to the idea that what’s outside doesn’t matter.
Our husbands end up feeling disregarded, disrespected, and hurt, when we willingly ignore what is on the outside.
Our husbands FEEL LOVED and cared for when we make the effort.
Happiness in your marriage does depend on your appearance.
Your husband wants to be proud of you!!!!
Here are areas that you can cover:
FIRST, are you practicing weight control?
Once again, you don’t have to be a size 2.
You just have to be a healthy size.
There are an array of diets and exercises in the internet.
SECOND, are you using make up properly?
Do you over do it with the makeup or under do it?
Do you just put it on during the week but omit weekends when with your husband?
THIRD, does he like your hairstyle?
Ask him!!
Current hairstyles may not be attractive to him.
He might be tired of your current hairstyle.
FOURTH, do your clothes fit you right?
Are your clothes to tight and showing your bulges?
Are your clothes to baggy because you lost weight?
You don’t need expensive clothes.
Never wear something you have worn the day before.
FIFTH, how is your personal hygiene?
Are you taking care of your teeth?
Are your clothes clean?
SIXTH, watch your posture.
SEVENTH, watch your gestures.
Try to always smile.
EIGHTH, do you make the most of what you have?
You don’t need to have a perfect body or looks.
Attractiveness is what you do with what you have.
NOTE: Daily there is a new post to help your marriage be a success.
LOVE YOUR SPOUSE 
I’m very disappointed in this post. I was an atheist saved at 43. God taught me so much about loving myself as a woman and never again to live in the worldly. That mean no make-up [eye liner is what i allow myself ever so often] modest dress. God taught me to love my body and protect it, cover it up for my husband. God taught me that this didn’t requires rules, this required me loving Him more than anything in the world even my husband or what I thought my husband wanted. Because We are supposed to love God first in everything. Do you think that God is molding your husband to be so superficial that it takes worldly ways to keep him interested? This list reminds me of worldly book stores filled with self-help books “12 ways to do this..” “25 things to do that…”, etc. The list is endless and God is not about that.
This is so sad because young women are following your lead and you as an elder are setting an example and if your example is that women need to fit a certain ideal with good posture and fixing their hair and do this and do that, etc…what are you doing is setting these young women for failure because you are far too perfect.
Yesterday I was listening to Pastor Matt Chandler on the book of Acts sermon, Acts 15.
“… 5 Then some of the believers who belonged to the party of the Pharisees stood up and said, “The Gentiles must be circumcised and required to keep the law of Moses.”
6 The apostles and elders met to consider this question. 7 After much discussion, Peter got up and addressed them: “Brothers, you know that some time ago God made a choice among you that the Gentiles might hear from my lips the message of the gospel and believe. 8 God, who knows the heart, showed that he accepted them by giving the Holy Spirit to them, just as he did to us. 9 He did not discriminate between us and them, for he purified their hearts by faith. 10 Now then, why do you try to test God by putting on the necks of Gentiles a yoke that neither we nor our ancestors have been able to bear? 11 No! We believe it is through the grace of our Lord Jesus that we are saved, just as they are.”
12 The whole assembly became silent as they listened to Barnabas and Paul telling about the signs and wonders God had done among the Gentiles through them. 13 When they finished, James spoke up. “Brothers,” he said, “listen to me. 14 Simon[a] has described to us how God first intervened to choose a people for his name from the Gentiles …”
You are a leader, you do not follow the things of this world or not only do you set yourself up for failure you take other women with you. God expects none of these rules for us. Those expectations you placed on yourself and now you are trying to get women to follow this advice and women do. Speak to God. God leads you. Not these rules of how a woman should look. This is bad. It goes against everything God is trying to teach us. God be with you to give you wisdom.
Hi Ingrid! Thanks for your comment. I probably wrote this in a way that it could be misinterpreted. My intention was not for wives to follow the things of the world. Before we are married, we put a lot of effort into looking nice for the one we love. The man falls in love with everything about her, or so we hope so. What happens to many wives after she is married, makes no effort at all to even comb her hair. Some women gain an enormous amount of weight and food becomes the love of her life. The husband asks and begs his wife to loose weight for health reasons but she is addicted to food. Those are the marriages that I am trying to help by this post. It takes the guidance of the Holy Spirit to strengthen a wife to change her pattern. It would take writing a book to fully explain this. On my blogs, I try to say as much as I can for a less than a five minute read.
Then perhaps you should say less but make sure that what you say is useful. Many things on this list are unnecessary. Posture? Gestures? To be natural, you just can’t be thinking about how you are standing or what your hands are doing all the time. We have to live our lives without being ‘spectators’ to it.