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YOUR SPOUSE NEEDS THESE (Part 2) 

9 Dec

YOUR SPOUSE NEEDS THESE (Part 2) 

GROWTH is another very important human need that is a must for your spouse’s life.

GROWTH is a process of becoming larger or longer or more numerous or more important.

In Genesis, God tells us that he made man in His image but with that he gave man the power to grow, enlarge and become more important.

Gen.1:27-28 “…so God created man in his image…And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply…”

These are powerful words:  Fruitful and Multiply.

The Hebrew word for “fruitful” means to grow, increase, and bring forth.

The Hebrew word for “multiply” means to enlarge, excel, grow up, increase, more and plentiful.

When I first got saved there was a poster that had a cute picture of a little boy and the caption read:” God Don’t Make No Junk.”

That is so true!

We are made in His image and he designed us to not just add to what we are, but to multiply what we are or think we are capable of.

We often learn of great people who have accomplished so much in their lives without arms, legs, sight or sound.

CASE AND POINT:  We have had Dave Roever visit our church a few times.  Every time I see or hear of him, my heart leaps.  This man had most of his face blown off during the Vietnam War during the sixties.  He had more than just his face blown off, he had vital organs destroyed and no one at the scene even thought he would make it.  God showed them the resurrecting power of the Holy Ghost!  He not only is alive, but he is a General in the army of the Lord.  Dave is one of the most beautiful loving men that our fellowship has ever met.  He devotes every minute of his life to the furtherance of the Gospel.  I must add, and is married to His sweetheart who waited for his return from Vietnam and is still nurturing him through his healing process.  What a precious, precious woman!!  Glory to God!!!

These are some biblical examples of areas of growth for us to pattern our lives after.

Prov.31:12 “She does him good and not evil ALL THE DAYS OF HER LIFE.”

 Prov.31:15  “She also RISES WHILE IT IS YET NIGHT…”

 Prov.31:17  “She GIRDS HERSELF WITH STRENGTH, And STRENGTHENS HER ARMS.”

 Prov.31:26  “She OPENS HER MOUTH WITH WISDOM, And on HER TONGUE is the law of KINDNESS.”

Remember that the enemy of your marriage is terrified of you!!

You and your spouse have the power of the Holy Spirit to create, be fruitful and to multiply!!

NOTE:  Don’t miss tomorrows post which is a continuation and will help make your marriage a success.

TICKLE HER FUNNY BONE

8 Dec

TICKLE HER FUNNY BONE

What makes your wife laugh?

What does she consider funny?

What shows make her smile, what jokes make her chuckle, what incidents in your own relationship bring laughter and fun to your home?

Try to design an evening for the two of you in which laughter is the main goal.

Don’t settle for something easy, like taking her to a funny movie.

That might be part of the date, but don’t make it the main event.

Spend some time figuring out how you can help your wife to really loose and laugh, and then do your best to tickle her funny bone.

Remember that the bible insists “a merry heart does good, like medicine” (Prov.17:22).

Laughter makes any day better!

So make this one better for both you and your spouse.

NOTE:  This article was take from “Family Life and Marriage Bible” by Dennis and Barbara Rainey

NOTE:  Tomorrow will be the continuation of “Your Spouse Needs These”.

HOW TO SHARE YOUR PAST WITH YOUR MATE

7 Dec

HOW TO SHARE YOUR PAST WITH YOUR MATE

Scripture tells us that Rahab, the prostitute from Jericho who hid the Israelite spies (Joshua 6:25), continued to live among God’s people and eventually became an ancestor of Jesus Christ (Matt.1:5).  You have to wonder: what did she tell her Hebrew husband about her past?

Any discussion of sensitive material from your past must occur between two people who understand and have experienced God’s grace and forgiveness.  If you are confident that you should proceed, consider some tips on how to confess information from your past.

1.  Explain why you are sharing this information now.  Make clear that you desire to deepen trust in your relationship.

2.  Give the big picture, not the details.  Don’t provide specifics of how you sinned.  And if you are receiving the information, do not ask probing questions merely to feed your morbid curiosity.  Vivid images will haunt you more than general statements.

3.  Ask for and grant forgiveness.  Don’t ever treat forgiveness flippantly, but ask for and grant forgiveness eagerly.

4.  Don’t expect an immediate resolution.  Keep a leash on your expectations.  Your spouse may not respond positively to your disclosure.  That’s okay.  Give your mate time to process this new information.

Finally, as you discuss the past, if you get off in a ditch and can’t get out, don’t be ashamed to ask for some help.  A trusted godly friend can be a great encouragement to both of you during these times.

NOTE:  This article is from Family Life Marriage Bible by Dennis and Barbara Rainey.

NOTE:  Daily there is a new post to help your marriage be a success.

YOUR SPOUSE NEEDS THESE (Part 1) 

6 Dec

YOUR SPOUSE NEEDS THESE (Part 1) 

There are six important human needs that every spouse can’t do without.

First, the need to be FLEXIBLE.

The definition for “flexible” is the ability to adjust readily to different conditions.

In marriage, not only should we allow our partner to be flexible, we also need to be flexible.

So often I will be talking to someone that is married whose ideas are very RIGID.

This is a person whose incapable of adapting or changing to meet circumstances.

Let me be blunt!!!  A person like that should not be married.

You are about to make your spouse miserable!!

With a capital “M”!

A person like that usually will marry someone that will spend the rest of their life catering to them and them only.

There are people like that around but they are FEW.

Marriage should be a union where each spouse knows their place and giftedness and puts their talent and ability into use.

As they yield themselves to flexibility, they learn and find new OPPORTUNITIES to explore.

CASE AND POINT:  When we lived in England in the 1980’s, our church was in a town called “Eccles.”  There were people coming to our church, that had never been out of Eccles.  They had no need to leave and were very comfortable with their surroundings.  The problem was that you could drive five minutes in any direction and you would be out of Eccles. It is extremely small.

In Proverbs there are some descriptive words we need to explore.

Prov.31:19-20 “She stretches out her hands to the distaff (the staff on which wool  or flax is wound before spinning), and her hand holds the spindle (a stick used to twist the yarn in spinning).  She extends her hand to the poor,  Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.

It is not a coincidence that the words STRETCH, EXTEND and REACH are used.

Matt.5:41 “And whoever compels you to go one mile, go with him two.”

 Jesus was not feeling sorry for anyone in this verse.

He wasn’t saying, “Oh, you poor thing!”

Jesus was saying the opposite, “Go the extra mile!”

 You need to go the other mile for your spouse.

Get out of Eccles!!!  Get out of your comfort zone!

Let your spouse get a new job, a new hobby, a new car, a new house, a new toy.

Next time you gain a few pounds and try to get into your old jeans, lets see how comfortable you are.

Those jeans start cutting into your skin and you end up with red sores at the seams.

Ask me how I know?  Lol!!

That is the same misery your spouse goes through when he has to play “Mother may I” and mom doesn’t play fair.

Remember your spouse married someone he could spend the rest of his life having FUN with.

In Malachi 2, it says that the wife is her husband’s COMPANION.

God designed you to be fun and flexible.

ARE WE HAVING FUN YET??

NOTE:  Tomorrow will be the continuation of the other five human needs in our life.

SWORD PRACTICE WITH YOUR SPOUSE  

5 Dec

SWORD PRACTICE WITH YOUR SPOUSE  

Why would you want to take up sword fighting with your spouse?

We don’t want to sword fight against our spouse, we want to sword fight with them on the same team.

The Apostle Paul tells us that we have a weapon that can devastate satans strategies against your marriage.

Eph.6:17 “And take…the sword of the spirit, which is the word of God.”

In the Greek, this word “sword” is MACHAIRA.

This word “machaira” is important because it was a special kind of sword.

There are a variety of swords used by the Roman soldiers.

The “machaira” was able to painfully shred the insides of it’s victim because it was used like a corkscrew.

It was a razor-sharp deadly and frightful weapon.

Just like this particular sword brought terror to the imagination of the enemy, the “sword of the spirit” torments the devil.

When the enemy starts to intervene in your marriage, get quiet in your heart and listen to the Holy Spirit.

The Holy Spirit will give you a Rhema (word) to speak at the devil.

This is close combat and a time to use your sword.

You use it like a corkscrew; Insert, Twist and do Damage!

Gods word stays dormant in your heart till you let it come out of your mouth, then it is a two-edged sword.

There is a difference between “rhema” and “logos.”

“Logos” is the written word of God.

“Rhema” is a quicken specific word from the Spirit.

The Holy Spirit teaches us to use it offensively and defensively.

We should earnestly study and practice sword exercise as Jesus did in his conflict with Satan and with the scribes and the Pharisees.

Sword practice in your marriage is allowing the Holy Spirit to supply, inspire and employ Gods word (machaira).

CASE AND POINT:  Japanese sword training is something of a lifelong journey.  Even the masters consider themselves to be humble students, constantly striving for perfection and always feeling that they can execute a cut cleaner, faster and with more precision.  In traditional Japanese sword training, techniques are often practiced many thousands of times before any degree of proficiency is obtained.

Do you have a good grasp of Gods word and know how to apply it with precision?

God’s word can be an effective weapon when attacks come against your marriage.

Don’t use a plastic toy gun!!!

We need to use specific scriptural truths to counter satanic falsehoods.

Insert, twist and do damage!!

NOTE:  Daily there is a new post to help your marriage succeed.

KEEP YOUR HELMET ON DURING DISPUTES

4 Dec

KEEP YOUR HELMET ON DURING DISPUTES

Safeguard your mind against every mental assault of the devil that can destroy your marriage.

In Ephesians the Apostle Paul tells us that at salvation you are given this kind of safeguard.

“…And take the helmet of salvation…” Eph.6:17

A Roman soldier who lost his helmet was in danger of head injuries that would cause him to be disoriented, or death.

A Christian who is unsure of their salvation can’t be bold in resisting Satan.

CASE AND POINT:  Motorcyclists have a risk of a fatal crash 35 times greater than a passenger car.  A head injury is the leading cause of death in motorcycle accidents.  An unhelmetted motorcyclist is 40% more likely to incur a fatal head injury.  Shortly after I met my husband, his 21 year old cousin was instantly killed in a traffic accident.  He was DUI when he hit a sign on the turnoff lane.  Unfortunately, he hit the sign after crashing with his head.  In the 60’s there were no law on helmet wearing.  If his cousin had worn a helmet, he would be alive because nothing else on his body was affected.  This is just a story, but to my husband’s family, many family members never emotionally recovered.  Helmet laws are saving lives.

The helmet of salvation protects our mind from doubt and discouragement including our marriage.

Paul knew that doubting your security in Christ would render you ineffective in spiritual warfare.

People do suffer from doubt and discouragement

The devil lies to us about our salvation and he used everyday experiences to do it.

  • You sure are giving a lot into your marriage and getting very little back.  Where is your God?
  • You are doing everything you can as a spouse to hold to high standards, but you just lost your job.  Why isn’t God helping?
  • You read your word everyday but your spouse hasn’t changed?  What is God waiting for?
  • You’ve been going to church for years, and look at your kids.  What’s God doing in your life?  I thought he loved you?

When we are discouraged is when we are the most vulnerable.

Discouragement is a lethal weapon in the hands of the enemy.

Often when a runner is on the “home stretch” of a race, suddenly his body refuses to go any further.

Keeping your mind on the goal is what will get you across the “finish line.”

Don’t conform to the evil world.

Many times in marriage, we take our helmets off and start to verbally attack our spouse.

PAST: Salvation means God has rescued you from the penalty of sin;

PRESENT: He is rescuing you from the power of sin; and

FUTURE: He will rescue you from the presence of sin.

God commands you to put on the helmet of salvation to protect you on how you think as worldly thoughts bombard you daily.

Fall in love with Jesus!

Partner with the Holy Spirit!!!!

You can’t be in better hands!!!

NOTE:  Daily there is a new post to help your marriage succeed.

QUENCH FLAMING MISSILES IN YOUR MARRIAGE

3 Dec

QUENCH FLAMING MISSILES IN YOUR MARRIAGE

 

 

Would you like to quench every flaming dart the devil tries to shoot into your marriage?

In Ephesians the Apostle Paul assures us that with our shield of faith, we can be supernaturally empowered to defend ourselves.

“Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.”  Eph.6:16

Every fiery dart the devil throws your way can be extinguished by the Holy Spirit.

CASE AND POINT:  During the Iraqi War and the Gulf War of 1991, scud missiles were being thrown at our soldiers and civilians.  The Patriot Missile system was designed to detect, target then hit an incoming missile.  Without the patriot missile, many lives would have been taken.

The “shield” was a large stone used to close and entrance; a door.

The shields were the full length of a man about the size of a door.

To assure the soldier that fiery darts would not affect them, the shield protected them from head to toe.

This is an example of the Holy Spirit protecting us as we use our “shield of faith.”

With God on our side, the enemy cannot penetrate our supernatural shield that is guarding us from head to toe.

Faith is an essential protection over your marriage against flaming arrows of temptation.

Oliver Wendell Holmes said, “It is faith in something that makes life worth living.”

Our marriage is in a war all the time.

When a flaming missile is lodged, it burns everything in its vicinity.

This is exactly the way the enemy works in our marriage since God’s word warns us that the devil is here to kill, steal and destroy.

You must carry the “shield of faith” in front of you.

The battle is not a power struggle, it’s a truth struggle.

Make sure that you are not quenching the Holy Spirit before you try to quench the devils darts.

What are the “fiery darts?”  doubts, fears, worries, etc.

Do you care enough for your marriage  to fight for it?

Choose between what is true and what is deceit in this world.

Is the devil throwing deceitful lying thoughts?

Your marriage is in a war zone!

Fight with the shield of Faith!!

NOTE:  Daily there is a new post to help your marriage be successful.